tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post5414191096249968376..comments2024-03-07T08:59:32.598+05:30Comments on My Think Pad: Forced parenthoodssilverinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16474136215458639419noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-67484545093591923402013-03-03T11:16:58.668+05:302013-03-03T11:16:58.668+05:30Interesting article at a time I am expecting a bab...Interesting article at a time I am expecting a baby in a few weeks :)forced parenthood is a truth. I have heard that from a colleague how she was forced into having a baby after 2 yrs of marriage. she seemed to be oscillating between motherly affection and anger because she had to leave baby with her parents.<br /><br />As for me I got married in the early 30s so you can imagine the pressure fromAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-56665657339465333542012-07-05T12:17:31.373+05:302012-07-05T12:17:31.373+05:30thought provoking read!thought provoking read!Anusha Subramaniannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-61760136981771094732012-04-25T16:57:55.552+05:302012-04-25T16:57:55.552+05:30Would like to add more thing here, dont know why b...Would like to add more thing here, dont know why but I have always observed that there are many elders in Kerala who look at kids as a complete burden, they would force the couple to have a child and first thing they would ask, after the kid is born is "Vazzaku indo"...this is something I have not understood till date :)I mean its so nice to see a child growing, trust me each moment is Good Lifehttp://beautifullifehappyliving.blogspot.in/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-45165326816912496212011-10-17T20:36:49.343+05:302011-10-17T20:36:49.343+05:30So what are you doing in church? I never notice th...So what are you doing in church? I never notice these when in church beyond a few irritations -:)Jaynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-91413953160032078962011-09-08T04:44:27.408+05:302011-09-08T04:44:27.408+05:30What young couples should not be forced to ..is g...What young couples should not be forced to ..is go to church if they have li'l kids. There's no other place where kiddo is supposed to be quiet for 1 hr standing absolutely still. Nothing which goes on inside makes sense to them and obviously they get annoyed. This does not make sense. Because of their conditioning - parents,esp young moms consider their sunday church responsibility moreAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-88018733889555468962011-05-14T02:10:13.358+05:302011-05-14T02:10:13.358+05:30I totally know what ur talking about.
Even my fath...I totally know what ur talking about.<br />Even my father in law has started asking-why are we not having kids after just two n a half years of marriage.<br />It does put an unecessary pressure. Even when you say, its individual choices- for a tightknit family or society, opinions from family members do act as a judgment on how well ur doing or set invisible standards of the best life possible.<Jinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04114322815517985585noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-36985603768466213062011-05-10T08:37:35.626+05:302011-05-10T08:37:35.626+05:30thought provoking read there... i really wish peop...thought provoking read there... i really wish people would stop assuming that parenthood or rather motherhood is the be all and end all for women.Remitha Satheeshhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07369734599954662099noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-23916896910335221262011-05-09T00:15:57.843+05:302011-05-09T00:15:57.843+05:30It may have a lot to do with the environment that ...It may have a lot to do with the environment that we grew up and our parents grew up.<br />My parents grew up in big families where they had to take care of their younger siblings and that gave them some training on what to do when they had kids of their own. I on the other hand grew up in a smaller family, and all the responsibilities of parenthood were taken up by my parents. I am pretty sure Sunilhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09959521295660673643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-17754306807984968292011-05-05T12:03:00.650+05:302011-05-05T12:03:00.650+05:30Anon at 10:31: I have seen this too. First it is n...Anon at 10:31: I have seen this too. First it is nagging to get married, then 'vishesham' nagging. Like there is nothing else to life.<br /><br />Monalisa: Your comments is contradictory. You say you don't agree with me while you are going through exactly what I wrote about. And congrats on the good news :)<br /><br />Anon at 9:22: It is a form of control I feel. <br /><br />Indu: silverinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16474136215458639419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-26735332354436471132011-05-03T13:11:39.903+05:302011-05-03T13:11:39.903+05:30And if the current generation is sensible, respons...And if the current generation is sensible, responsible enough to choose a partner and get married to him/her when they are ready, why blame the parents or grandparents when it comes to procreation. <br /><br />It is your choice and you should know if you are ready. <br /><br />The problem happens when you leave this choice to others. The problem happens if you are also expecting your parents to Happy Kittenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14406399936808407736noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-75021311815459130642011-05-03T05:28:52.355+05:302011-05-03T05:28:52.355+05:30hmm. I see a lot of those around these days. I wis...hmm. I see a lot of those around these days. I wish the young couples are sensible enough to rebel and wait it out.<br /><br />An aunty I spoke with last week, said that one should have kids soon after the wedding because it's a sort of a security. Otherwise, it's always the insecurity that the hubby/wife will want out of the marriage.<br /><br />I dont know why she has such a rigid set Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18411697702687310877noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-64694718220858752302011-04-29T10:31:08.860+05:302011-04-29T10:31:08.860+05:30hey silverine,
you hit the nail on the head.Ask m...hey silverine,<br /><br />you hit the nail on the head.Ask me about it. Got married in the "wrong side of twenties" and after 3 years of marriage we are still childless by choice. The hints are unbearable. And they are not from our parents. Infact, they are the most silent people on this issue. But "well wishers" are a different ball game. I even got an hour lecture on how Indunoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-52921062517295088472011-04-28T10:10:47.255+05:302011-04-28T10:10:47.255+05:30@ some commenters, stop wasting your time trying t...@ some commenters, stop wasting your time trying to attack the post. It has become fashionable to attack bloggers these days specially if the blog has touched a raw nerve :p I can see your desperateness because I guess I hit the truth ;) So chill maadi and go have a beer folks!silverinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16474136215458639419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-8507369070453559082011-04-27T21:22:46.659+05:302011-04-27T21:22:46.659+05:30A mans manliness and a woman's virtue is ques...A mans manliness and a woman's virtue is questioned if they don't have kids. It is hard escaping from these elders.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-64177588232763939772011-04-27T08:34:22.879+05:302011-04-27T08:34:22.879+05:30"But i would agree on grandparents' naggi..."But i would agree on grandparents' nagging from the first month of marriage."<br /><br />@monalisa....that is forcing parenthood ...<br /><br />Vivek StanleyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-45759927815338909242011-04-27T06:36:50.397+05:302011-04-27T06:36:50.397+05:30I would not completely agree with you on forcing a...I would not completely agree with you on forcing a couple into parenthood. Thats simply not possible. But i would agree on grandparents' nagging from the first month of marriage. Its almost a year and half i'm married, and i know all the trouble with ppl around regarding having children. We (I and my husband) most times had hard time escaping from elders. yes, we could understand their Monalisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03960416787549809643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-68718785892385677782011-04-26T22:31:19.001+05:302011-04-26T22:31:19.001+05:30Hey there,
This post moved me to comment. I couldn...Hey there,<br />This post moved me to comment. I couldn't agree more with you out here. Produce a kid ASAP is the memo every single married woman gets. I interact with young people on a daily basis and it is absolutely pathetic to see how ingrained the "vishesham" topic is, it's as if they have nothing else to talk about. Your hopes,dreams, aspirations count for nothing esp if uAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-51219403288298428932011-04-26T21:12:03.251+05:302011-04-26T21:12:03.251+05:30dr antony: I don't think you understand that I...dr antony: I don't think you understand that I write about what I see and hear over a period of time. There are lots of people I talk to before I write. I am no researcher, but neither am I an arm chair commenter either. So dont assume that these are my assumptions. It is you who is assuming just for the sake of opposing here. If you dont agree to a post it better not to comment unless you silverinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16474136215458639419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-10593848851050254282011-04-26T13:13:51.075+05:302011-04-26T13:13:51.075+05:30Hi
You don't have to agree with me,just as I d...Hi<br />You don't have to agree with me,just as I don't have to agree with you.These are opinions.I don't think we are authorities in parenting and can make our assumptions acceptable to every one.<br /><br />I don't believe in this forced parenthood you talk about.No one forces anyone to become parents.If they don't want to have children they can choose to live so.And who is dr.antonyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16191095888228061156noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-84651453612084975912011-04-26T11:32:29.718+05:302011-04-26T11:32:29.718+05:30dr antony: I am afraid I don't agree with you....dr antony: I am afraid I don't agree with you. Didnt Jesus himself chide people who prevented kids from meeting him? There was another couple in the church for whom the child was a priority and one of them stayed outside. This girl couldn't stand the baby. My parents took turn to got to church so that one of them could watch over us. If you love your kids, you will adjust to them. Period.silverinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16474136215458639419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23425148.post-6101480960771507812011-04-26T11:15:22.871+05:302011-04-26T11:15:22.871+05:30This is one reason churches should have separate a...This is one reason churches should have separate area for mothers and children.Inside the church,children might cry and disturb others.What if this lady didn't have the mother in law? They would be forced to go in to the church with the kid.I think the only reason the girl couldn't take her baby inside would be because she didn't want to disturb others.<br /><br />And what if it were dr.antonyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16191095888228061156noreply@blogger.com